Oh! Oh! Oh!

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This is a work of fiction, all characters are over the age of 18.


Oh! Oh! Oh!

I bounced breathlessly up to the bar.

“Hit me Tony!” The barman grinned and handed over a glass he had just finished filling.

“Saw you heading my way gorgeous, this one’s on me!” I giggled and was about to take a drink when a voice behind me spoke. “I wouldn’t if I were you.” I turned and gazed into the good looking face of a guy who was, unfortunately, at least 20 years younger than me. I gave a mental shrug; I could enjoy looking without him thinking me a pervert. I smiled at him. “Why wouldn’t you?”

“You didn’t see him pour it, he might have slipped anything in there.” Out of a sense of mischief I turned to Tony who was glowering at my new friend. “Hey Tony, you trying to slip me a mickey so you can slip me a length later?” A cough and sudden wetness on the back of my neck suggested my young pal had spluttered his drink over me.

“Nah, you’re safe with me sis, not really into incest.” Tony grinned and moved off to serve elsewhere knowing I was perfectly capable of looking after myself.

“Sorry.” My erstwhile saviour looked crestfallen as he attempted to mop the back of my neck with a napkin. “It’s only water, so at least it won’t stain.” He grinned sheepishly and held out a hand. “Start again? Nick.”

I shook his hand. “Chelle. And that was rather unfair of me, especially when you meant well.” I waved at his water. “You here for a top up?” Nick nodded. I looked over the bar. “Tony, when you’ve a chance, another two of these.” I waved my glass at him, he nodded to show he’d heard as I turned back to Nick.

“So, you sober through choice or short straw tonight?”

“Choice.” He didn’t elaborate. “You?”

“Ditto” I waved an arm at the room. “Doesn’t make it easy to tolerate all this shite though does it?”

Nick snorted a laugh as we studied the festive excesses around us. Several smaller companies shared the hall for a sit down Christmas dinner followed by a disco. Each company sat at their own tables where drink had been flowing for a couple of hours now. Women of all ages and sensibilities, who wouldn’t normally look twice at their male colleagues, had dressed in slinky, spangly, slutty outfits and teetered on lethally spiked heels as they flirted, danced, wiggled and jiggled, vying for masculine attention.

Their male cohorts, having already given each woman marks out of ten, were debating which woman they would shag in the toilets, which they would allow to give them a blowjob in the car and which they would go home with and righteously roger all night. Obviously as the night went on, these guys would get drunker and the list of amenable women would shrink until they ended up having a quickie against the outside wall with the fat bird with buck teeth from accounting and spend the next twelve months avoiding her at work. (Quite possibly repeating the whole sorry scenario nextChristmas.)

Nick and I spent the next hour or so pointing out various ‘attributes’ male and female on display, and chatting easily. We shared a similar snarky humour and several times Nick made me laugh out loud. I found myself yet again ruefully wishing he were older or I were younger. – who the fuck am I kidding? I just wished I were younger!

“So Chelle, now I’ve friended you on Facebook and added you to my Twitter account,” deadpanned Nick, “can I ask why the water?”

I shrugged, it was no big secret. “I enjoyed drinking a little too much; decided I prefer to respect myself in the mornings.”

“I get that. So you used to throw yourself at the likes of ‘skinny jeans’ over there after a few sherries huh?”

“Seriously, did you know they made them that big?” I chuckled. “Nah, I’m too old for him. More like ‘glittery chest hair’ over there”

“Fuck babe, no wonder you stopped drinking” Nick grinned at me his eyes loaded with interest and I began to get a warm and moist feeling. No, I wasn’t sitting on a leaky hot water bottle. But I did suddenly wise up. Sure it was too good to be true.

“So Nick, you and your pals got a bet going, who can pick up the saddest old bag in the room?” My enjoyment in his company dissipating as I turned away.

“Hey,” a pair of strong arms turned me around and a firm hand raised my chin until my eyes unwillingly met his. “I was actually enjoying the company of the first woman I had seen in this room who wasn’t desperately seeking to be centre of attention.”

“Yeah right.” I mumbled.

“Okay I realise you are a little older than I am,” he held halkalı escort a finger to my lips as I tried to speak and looked sternly at me. “But all that interests me is that you are fun to be with, you have a great laugh,you are intelligent stimulating company… and you keep my glass topped up!” Turning to check Tony was serving down the other end he leaned in. “Quite apart from all that, you have a cleavage I could spend hours in and an ass I want to spank as I plunder your cunt with my cock.”

I swallowed, momentarily speechless for the first time in my life. I took a large swig from my glass. “You do realise I am old enough to be your mother?” I finally managed to croak.

“Uh huh.” Apparently that didn’t phase him one little bit.

“I have cellulite. Even on my arms, look.”

“Uh huh.”

“My thighs are flabby, I have mini muffin tops spilling over my hold ups”

“Oh, God” Nick groaned. “Now all I think of is that you are wearing stockings. Please don’t tell me you are wearing these grannie panties that squeeze everything two sizes smaller?”

“No, a thong. Which by the way disappeared about 3 hours ago. As we speak, Brian Blessed and a carefully selected band of Gurkha are searching a dangerous crevice for it.”

“I’m sure i could find it…With my tongue.”

I gulped at the image and went a little bandy. “Nick you’re, what 29, 30? I’m not sure how old you think I am, but add some. And then another couple of years. I mean I am waving at MILF in the rear view mirror honey.”

“You have dancing eyes, a filthy chuckle and I want to throw you over my shoulder, carry you up to my room, toss you onto my bed and make you come ’til you’re spineless. I want to strip you slowly, kissing every bit of soft skin I expose. My tongue wants to introduce itself to your clit and my fingers itch to seek out your G spot. I want to hear you groan – yeah, just like that -I want to pound your pussy ’til you to scream out my name.”

I held onto the counter, as my legs appeared to have lost their ability to bear my weight. I couldn’t tear my eyes from his. He actually seemed to mean it.

“You have a room here?”

“That’s what you heard?”

“I,” I took a drink a tried again. “I,” nope, no good, I had lost the art of communication. On the plus side, I was nearing my first non self-induced orgasm in about three years. Just from his words. Seriously, my clit was throbbing, my nipples were attempting the great escape ( minus the motor bike) and my core was clutching air wishing it had a big ol’ cock to suck on. I tried again. “Nick?”

He turned heavy lidded eyes to mine, I think he had turned himself on as much as me. “Yeah”

“What room number?” Barely were the words out my mouth before he grabbed my hand and began hauling my away from the bar.


“It’s ok Tony, I’ll call you tomorrow.” I turned to Nick. “Eager as I am to get on with the whole sucking and fucking entertainment that you have planned, I have to make excuses to my boss, he’d normally expect me to stick around to the bitter end.”

“Tell him something came up suddenly. About eight inches of something.” As he rubbed my hand against his erection I found it difficult to dispute his measurements.

An award winningly pantomimed migraine later, I was free of my obligations and found Nick waiting impatiently by the elevator.

“Is there anything I should know? Any particular reason you are propositioning a decrepit heap like me instead of a lush 20 year old?”

“Nothing missing or deformed I promise. I just prefer a woman who will be as enthusiastic as me in the sack, rather than worrying that she is mussing up her hair or smudging her make up. I get the feeling Chelle, that you fuck as heartily as you laugh.”

“If I remember rightly, I did use to enjoy a bout of bed wrestling.” It had been quite a while. I just hoped I wasn’t out of practise. As we entered the elevator, I pulled Nick towards me and we fused lips. I hate sloppy, slobbery kissers who tried to fit their whole tongue in your mouth before you have barely opened it. Not Nick. Oh Lordy, his firm lips manipulated mine until they signed a surrender treaty and sold my tongue out for better conditions. Sweet.

Panting, we surged laughing out of the lift almost running down the corridor. Nick was tugging at buttons and had his belt undone as he reached to swipe the room card. Thank god it worked first time, and we stumbled into the room grappling flesh and giggling. Nick taksim escort reached for the light.

“No!, Oh crap Nick, I am seriously old and wrinkly, wouldn’t you rather fuck me in the dark so you can pretend I’m all cute and pert?”

In reply he turned on the light and gently, allowing for me to resist, raised my dress until he could lift it over my head, leaving me standing defiantly old and saggy, in pull ups, thong and bra.

“Oh sweet lord. I don’t care what you say woman, you are just delicious. C’mere” he tugged me to him for another kiss, this one surprisingly tender and sweet. Pulling back he led me gently towards the bed and sat me down. He kissed me again as he knelt, his fingers running up and down my stocking clad legs, before leaning in to kiss my thighs at the top of the elastic. I was as wet as parts of Cumbria by now and quivering with lust. Slowly, stocking at a time, he revealed my legs, kissing down each one to the foot before working his way back up. Using his elbows he nudged my legs apart, running his tongue up to where my thighs met my core. Sitting back on his knees he grinned up at me. “This is gonna be so fun.” I giggled. This was not how I expected my boring works Christmas Party to end.

“You have such a dirty laugh woman.” He ran a negligent finger up the length of my centre and tapped my throbbing clit. “And you are smiling at me.” He was staring at my other lips but smirked up at my eyes. “I am going to kiss you now Chelle.” NIck moved in and spread my legs further, his 5 o’clock shadow scraping my thighs as he began french kissing my pussy. Jesus H, the boy was good. Kind of like an R8 is a nice runaround.

He was merciless, he dragged me to the edge of a climax then threw me off screaming. Bastard must have had me on bungy elastic ‘coz I kept coming back up. Finally I grabbed his ears and pulled his head free. “Nick, if you don’t fuck me right now, only one of us is leaving this room alive.” I was aiming for fierce, but I think my giggles gave me away. Smeared in my cream, Nick grinned wolfishly at me, launching himself up the bed and dragging me with him.

He shared my taste with me in his rapid, puppy kisses, before diving onto my tits bringing them together in his huge hands and swivelling his eyes between them deciding which to torment first. He chose his victim and latched on, nipping and suckling sending zingers straight to my sex. His fingers found themselves a nice cosy hole to visit, which they did repeatedly, finding, as promised, the part of me that sends my hips skyward. I was fast approaching a second orgasm and had yet to even see Nicks appendage let alone touch it.

“Get naked gorgeous, I’m feeling hungry.” I growled. Cheerfully he stood back up, losing his Jeans and boxers, giving me my first view of his rightfully proud cock. I’d have said 8 inches was a modest approximation, it’s purple head leaking; it jutted out just begging for a lick. I swivelled onto my knees on the bed and drew him close, shamelessly manhandling his glorious butt. Innocently I gazed up. “Teeth in or out?” At his dawning look of horror I burst out laughing.

“Kidding, I’m kidding!” As if I weighed nothing, Nick flipped me. “You are so getting spanked for that.” He landed a hard hand on my arse, the zap of pain sending more juices flooding out of me. He swiped a finger through it and held it to my lips. I sucked his finger in, rolling my tongue around it before slowly releasing him. He groaned and his dick bounced.

“Fuck Nick, it’s no good. I just have to have a taste of that before you plunder me.” I turned and gently pulled him nearer. With the tip of my tongue I licked the salty droplet from his head. Working my way down, I teased and tasted him, learning from his responses. I suckled his balls as I drew a nail between them. Moving back up, I finally allowed myself the pleasure of a full taste, drawing that gorgeous cock deep into my mouth, deeper with each movement. Nick gave a strangled “Hngh!” and grabbed my shoulders as his hips twitched, his dick seeking more.

Slowly, gently he fucked my mouth. We stared at each other, souls bared in the intimacy of the moment. His forehead creased with concentration, his balls tightening, I pulled back enough to speak. “Let go babe, let go.” I dropped back down onto his cock, sucking harder and humming. Clutching my shoulders tight enough to bruise and trying to control his thrusts, Nick gave in and let go. Pumping wildly as I drew him close, I felt the first twitch and pulse. Holding him tight as he tried şişli escort to pull out I shook my head as I sucked harder swallowing his salty come. As he eased out of my mouth, I licked his dick clean.

Nick held my cheeks pulling me up into a deep kiss. “Don’t think you distracted me woman, you are still getting spanked.”

“I’m sure I deserve it.” I hadn’t had this much fun in the bedroom in forever. Nick must have been thinking the same, as his cock twitched and began to lengthen. Thank the lord for virile young men who like horny old bats! Spanking temporarily forgotten, Nick reattached himself to a nipple as both hands massaged my tits. he groaned and dropped his face into my cleavage, all but smothering himself as he rolled my boobs around his face; and his face around my boobs.

“Chelle, I just love your tits. I don’t think I will ever get enough of them.” He latched onto a nipple, tongue wrestling it. I tried very hard not to focus on the unspoken message in his words that tonight might not just be a one off, and decided just to go with the flow. And boy was I flowing tonight!

Rolling onto his back and pulling me with him, Nick pushed me up until I was sitting on his chest. I was torn between scooting up further to see if that tongue was up for wrestling my clilt, or sliding down to the prize I had been waiting on since we walked through the door.

Staring at me as if I was the prize Nick made my decision for me. “I want to watch you ride my cock Chelle. Fuck, you turn me on like nobody else.” I slid lower, and feeling the firm bulk of him under me, I lifted a little, before dropping back and locating the tip of his dick with my clit. Gently, I whispered the two together; silk gliding over silk, feeling the magnetic draw – the ache for more, for deeper, for faster, for harder. Ignoring it, I continued brushing my clit across his sensitive tip. Both of us now leaking freely, I was shaking with suppressed need even as I drew us both higher

“Fuck Chelle!” Chords stood out from Nicks neck as he struggled to contain himself. “What the fuck are you doing to me? Jesus fuck, I am going to come from you doing this!” I could feel another orgasm building up as well. I knew Nick had staying power, could probably get it up a third time, but I couldn’t wait any longer to feel him inside me. Moving up, I reached behind to grasp his slick dick and guide it in.

Lowering myself slowly, giving myself time to adjust to his size, I finally seated him. sitting up, I looked at the younger man who made me feel so sexy and attractive, and smiled. Using my thigh muscles I rose and lowered, rolling my hips so as to stimulate my clit and my G spot. I traced my nipples as I stared at Nick’s lust filled gaze. He moved his hand to touch my clit before grabbing my hips and lifting me so that he could thrust up, pulling me down onto him hard and deep. Fuck it felt good. I let Nick control the pace, I was just happy to be along for the ride. I hoped the neighbours thought I was just praying enthusiastically, as I ‘God Yes’d at the top of my voice.

Nick flipped us again so that I was on my back, and notched it up gear. I could feel my orgasm nearing, my core began to spasm, my clit, being hit by every thrust was about to break loose and I had to grasp my tits to relieve the pressure building up in them. I looked at Nick, he was lost in his own desire, grunting and thrusting his neck tendons straining. Suddenly he looked straight at me. “Chelle, I’m gonna fucking come.”

“Yes! Yes, babe come now. Fuck me harder, I’m going to come too.” My words pushed us both into a frenzy, my legs locked behind his knees my heels on his butt urging him on, Nick thrusting deeper, rising on his arms as he pushed forward, straining to climb into me. We both began pulsing and crying out inhumanly, pumping in a simultaneously prolonged orgasm that seemed to drag us along past the point we had the energy ourselves.

Finally shuddering to a slow grinding halt, Nick collapsed onto me. “I’ll move in just a second,” he panted. “I just need to get some use back in my limbs.” He snorted a laugh. I stroked his back.”It’s okay. I kind of like your weight on me.” Regardless of my words, Nick rolled off me, drawing me into his side. I snuggled in happily, and hoped he wouldn’t ask me to leave just yet.

He wrapped his arms around me dropping soft kisses, lovers kisses on my shoulders. I felt him smile against my skin.

“What?” I asked

“Don’t be thinking that the most incredible sex of my life is going to distract me from that spanking I owe you.”


“But darlin’ it’s going to have to wait until the morning, you’ve worn me out.”

“That’s the trouble with the youth of today, no staying power.” A nip on my shoulder told me that wouldn’t go unpunished either. I fell asleep shortly after, looking forward to what the morning would bring.

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